Confusion.complication.

I need to be open about my suffering to someone in person... I think it could help me because i would be able to get it off of my chest.. but im not sure who I could trust.. everyone talks about me i know it.. even my parents.. people stare, laugh, make snide remarks towards me.. its because im fat.. im obsese... disgusting.. I dont understand how my parents let me out of the house when i look like this, why people walk with me.. but they're trying to destroy me.. make fun of me.. my suffering is there entertainment.. I just don't know who to trust anymore, i can't trust anyone, they're all the same.. they want me to be fat, and unhappy.. they don't want me to be happy and perfect..
But i will show them i can.. even if i die, i would die perfect.. i would be in peace, no noise, no arguements no nothing.. just silence..

Twitter Confusion

Arghh.... twitter is the most confusing thing but follow me? @danniilea7

eurgh....

today i let myself down, i over ate once again why can't i just stop eating... since when i eat it turn to binge eat... then purging which isn't good i hate it! uhh i hate myself for the way my body is why can't i be small and petite rather than this big thing that covers me! I know i can be skinny some day it just takes time but i get bored of waiting for the perfect body which i want now! it maybe selfish, but i hate it when i do really well for a couple of days then one day its all ruined. when i get below 6st if my mum finds out shes sending me to an ED clinic so hopefully i'll hide it.

 I am the victim of my mirror, a slave to my own reflection, magazines fill my addiction, whilst food teases my addiction.

Isabelle Caro

Beautiful

R.I.P

She's was and still amazing for the stregnth she had when everyone thought she was gone, but no she kpt fighting on showing that she was willing to recover and the sheer dertermination she had and the dreams to have a family with children she would have made an amazing mother and wife to some lucky people. I feel for her family and friends that have lost her to a psychological trap, that is hard to escape for anyone but she was half way there by wanting to recover. But again she fell asleep in the arms of Ana (god bless her) I honestly thought she was so happy and looking forward to life that she would have made it, her life was taken over and never given back. But she has made an impact probably not only in my life but everyone elses who cares and suffers. Your will always be beautiful and strong in my eyes ♥

fantastic...

fuck haters, they give me the motivation I need.

New Year?

Well I would like to say Happy New Year to everyone that reads this :)

As they say New Year New You, well I have a new target date, and new goal weight.
16th July - 77lb
Personally I think its a reasonable target and weight since I'm 93lb now, so it's not extreme but its reachable.
New Years Resolutions:
- To get better friends (more outgoing)
- To lose weight
- To do better in some lessons at school.
Hopefully I'll follow them this year since many people make them but then forget after the first so many weeks.
Anyway I don't think there's much to really write, I've been doing pretty well I haven't really been in the mood for eating, but I think I could maybe pick up on the exercise more since i haven't done hardly any for a while.

Take Care x

Its becoming an obsession

Meaning;
She has magazine clippings coming out of her head and a tape measure, because she has a constant battle with the media idustry and to be skinny, the tape measure is going in spirals because its a rollercoaster ride, she has her up's and downs. She has an open head because thats all she thinks about and it posseses her thoughts. Theres also three endings to the tape measure each means Life, Death and Recovers. Death is at the top because shes so close to it, Life is second furthest away because shes constantly fighting to live but Recovery is the furthest away because its almost impossible. Because the magazine clippings are attached to the inside of her head means that it is a part of her life and always will be. The tears that run down her face are just tears of emotion; fear, but its also a part of her which is being wasted by the thoughts of being skinny. The melting of the face shows that she is disolving into becoming just an image to the media industry and society, that its not her anymore and shes slowing dying.